Getting Mad at Sarah Palin

Firstly, I should say I am a feminist – I believe women are as intelligent and able as men. But, in marriage, one partner has to put the children ahead of their career - and it can be the father or the mother. You get one shot at raising children, and they have to feel that they are worth more than a parent’s occasional glance.
Sarah Palin, despite her Christian rhetoric concerning family sanctity, has put her career first. When she was first introduced as the Vice-Presidential candidate by John McCain and her family trooped onto the stage, I saw Palin’s oldest daughter carrying the baby and thought, “That woman is using her daughter as a babysitter.” But it was worse. The girl was hiding her own fledgling motherhood!
If Chelsea Clinton had fallen pregnant at 17, the Republican Right would have criticised Hilary as neglectful and too career orientated. But Sarah Palin is, apparently, a heroic mother who supports her daughter’s decision to have the child and marry.
But where was Sarah Palin when her teenage daughter needed to talk about boys, petting, going ‘too far’, contraception, and all those other topics that create anguish in teenagers? It is not good enough to say she is a great mother and career woman simply because she holds high office and has a large family. Being a good mother means you are there for your children – especially those times when they need to talk.
My husband travelled a lot with work – not unlike Todd Palin, an oil-worker frequently away from home – and we knew the family would suffer if we both worked long hours. As a result, I freelanced from home when my children were young. The boys would come in from school, climb the stairs to my office and tell me about their day. Then, having poured it out, they could relax, eat something hearty and feel all was well with the world. One day my son came home with a long involved story about who said what to whom, and who had fallen out and taken sides. It was the usual teen drama. I was working on an involved story and lost patience with the detail.
“Scott, I’m working!”
He recoiled, as though I had slapped him. “But, Mom, this is important.” He was clearly upset by what had happened that day, and I knew I had to take my head out of work and listen to what was, to him, a very important story.
As a state governor, and in other high-ranking roles, you can’t always stop and listen to your children. People and departments need you to read, respond, meet and decide on far-reaching topics that matter to tax payers.
Feminism has come a long way since the sixties and seventies rhetoric about “having it all.” What most of us learn is that we can’t. Someone, husband or wife, has to put children first.